To Parents of all students in Years 7-12

"Parties that go well are well planned parties"

From time to time parents seek information and advice about managing parties. The disappointing behaviour of some young people at highly publicised social events really comes as no surprise to the police or school authorities where parties have been organised for very large numbers of people and where alcohol and other drugs have been freely available.

Our experience in recent years is that parties become difficult to manage when numbers swell, uninvited guests attend and there is no parental involvement or when gatherings turn into parties.

It is important that parents get to know their children's friends and where possible, their parents. They should feel comfortable about telephoning each other to discuss their children's forthcoming social plans, to clarify expectations about arrangements and to avoid ambiguities about standards. Co-operation between families makes a big difference. For the increased safety of adolescents, parents are strongly advised to tell their children that they are going to telephone the host's parents.

Some ideas about Going to Parties

Confirm the invitation and telephone the parent of the host, to enquire:

1. whether your teenager is invited;
2. about the number of expected guests and the level of adult supervision;
3. about the serving of/or the permitting of alcohol at the party;
4. about the commencement and finishing time of the party.

Telephone the parent(s) of your teenager's friends who are invited to the party, particularly if you do not know the host to confirm:

1. that their teenager is attending;
2. transport arrangements.

• Drive your teenager to the party and introduce yourself to the host and the host's parents.
• Particularly with younger teens, you may wish to take the opportunity to see the venue, the level of adult supervision, the presence of alcohol and drugs, the age of the guests, familiar faces, check the pick up time with the hosts and confirm this time with your teenager before leaving the party.
• Ensure that your teenager has your contact phone number during the party (preferably programmed into their mobile phone) and ensure that this number is accessible.
• Confirm pick up transport arrangements (including an emergency plan, cab charge, credit card).
• It should be a strong expectation that boys show respect for girls, for each other and for the host's home.

Some ideas about Having a Party

Firstly, consider the reason for having the party and whether an alternative may be better.

Decide on a format for the party.

1. The number of guests and a list of the guests' names and phone numbers.
2. Food and drink.
3. No alcohol or drugs rule. No alcohol to be provided to guests and no guests to bring alcohol or drugs. There are legal implications arising from the provision and serving of alcohol on our property to minors (i.e. under 18s).
4. Entertainment: music equipment (nominate only certain guests to operate the music), dance area, "games", themes, hire of equipment.
5. Issue individual invitations to guests on the list. Group invitations should be avoided.
6. Do not include your address or the venue address; include your phone number only.
7. Include an RSVP date.
8. Include a starting time and definite finish time on the invitations.
9. Inform neighbours of all relevant details including timing.

Once numbers are confirmed

Plan appropriate security.

1. Ensure numbers invited are appropriate to venue, security and supervision.
2. Suggested ratio is one adult to ten young guests.
3. Define single entry/exit point to the party. Secure other points of entry as closed.
4. Security personnel are required at the single entry-exit point to the party. These adults will monitor the guests' entry from the list of those attending and record how guests are intending to get home, e.g. parents will collect or taxi. Advise guests they are not to leave the party until the party has concluded.
5. If guests insist on leaving the party early then record their exit time on the LIST. Notify the guests that you will contact their parent of their exit time from the party. Confirm parent's contact number.
6. A security adult (the adult hosts) should be at the entry to the party area to take all bags from guests and place these in a container in full view of other guests. This will minimise the risk of theft from bags and sneaking alcohol and drugs.
7. Ensure toilet areas are well lit and adult supervision is present and discreet.
8. Notify the police beforehand of your plans for a party.
9. Areas adjacent to parks, reserves and common/vacant lots must be properly supervised to minimise the risk of gatecrashers. Hire of professional security services and additional lighting equipment in these areas is recommended.

Re-arrange furniture to create one party area . Remove all items of value especially jewellery, CDs, DVDs, TV Games, from this area. Secure access to other areas of the house, to minimise the risk of theft by guests.

Purchase food and drink.

1. Drink should be served in unopened cans or juices and water poured from cask-type dispensers.
2. Do not serve drinks from open bowls or containers.
3. Have lots of appetising and filling food (pizza, mini burritos and fajitas, stuffed potatoes, rolls, party pies and finger food, sushi, pastries and desserts and sweets)
4. Invite guests to pass food around (to give guests something to do).
5. Get adults to pass food around (to gauge the behaviour of guests).

The Party

• Give each security person a copy of the list of those attending.
• Place security people in positions: at entry/exit point, at entry to party area (near bag container), and in areas adjacent to open spaces.
• Place a container for bags in full view of the party area.
• Set up beverage service points.
• Mingle with guests.
• Discourage smoking or, at least, provide an area, marked by ashtrays.
• One hour before the conclusion of the party record on the LIST who requires a taxi. Group guests into areas, and order the taxis for each group.

( With acknowledgement to St Aloysius College 'Party's Checklist' and P & F Association of South Australian Catholic Schools 'Teenage Parties'.)